Monday, October 5, 2009
Dear Lani Garver,
You inspire me so much.
I never have felt emotion the way I did when I was with you. You taught me SO much, and I am forever forever grateful. You taught me not to judge people. And although I do and everyone does (if they say they don't they're lying) you make me try harder not to, you make me think about that person and who they really might be. You taught me that everyone is different, sometimes it's good to be out-of-the-box, not everything is as it seems, and to just love.
You changed my life. You honestly changed my life.
I talk about you often, actually. I can't not tell people about you, because you are the most amazing person I've ever encountered. You really are a guardian angel. To more people than you know.
You put me in awe. You make me want to be a better person. You make me a better person. You affected my life at such a young age, and I really think you played a role in making me who I am. I honestly mean that. You're such a savior. You put me in touch with emotions I didn't even know I had. You actually made me cry...I don't cry. Like ever. You made me realize that people are not what they seem, good and bad. People that look bad can be good, and people that look good can actually be bad. I learned how to be ME when I was with you. You taught me that I can be whatever I want, and even though I stray from trying to be who I want me to be, that it's okay to be who I want to be. That no one can ever take that away from me. No one.
You altered my perception on life, love, society, and humanity. You impacted my life so much. And to think we were only together for about a week....never since. That is really stinky actually. I'm sorry. I know I'm forgiven.
I can't even begin to express how much you've impacted my life, and I am so sorry I can not do it to the best of my ability. You deserve so much more than I am capable of writing down. Just know that you are my hero. You hold such a dear place in my heart. And I hope that shows you how much you mean to me. Does it? Can you tell? I really hope so, because you deserve so much more than I can give you.
You deserve the best. And I can't give you that. But I'm just human. Are you?
Are you Lani? Or are you an angel? Maybe a little of both. I like to think that. Gives humanity a little hope. How does that make you feel? That your existence makes me hope in our future? We can use all the hope we can get.
You will continue to inspire me for the rest of my life. I'll always think of you. Especially when I think of those who altered my life beyond what they can believe. And you are one of them, my friend.